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Pakistani Government Officials Become Comedians In Wake Of bin Laden’s Death

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In a move that did not surprise many, all the people associated with the governance of Pakistan suddenly turned into stand up comedians. Taking advantage of the massive interest that was generated after Osama bin Laden was temporarily sent to hell, government officials started responding to media enquiries by cracking jokes at a press conference.

When asked how the world’s most wanted terrorist was able to make a home in a huge mansion that lay right next to a military installation, the Prime Minister seemed to get livid and shouted “How dare the Americans violate the sanctity of our sovereignty?”. This was met with roars of laughter that rang throughout the room. He quickly added, “See what I did there? I poked fun at my country. Only the most secure people can do that. That was a non-sequitir by the way”, he gloated. “It means that the ending is different from the beginning,” he continued as he spoiled everyone’s trip just as they were falling into a laughing fit.

"....and I was like whaaa? Osama? In Pakistan?"

“But seriously,” said Gilani as he produced a coin from behind President Zardari’s ear, “we had no idea where bin Laden was until I saw the news. I immediately rang up my ISI friends and asked them who this bin Laden was and why his death was so important that it was splashed all across the media.” he said as he put his hand into Zardari’s shirt and removed a length of handkerchiefs tied to each other, presumably as an attempt at prop humor.

“Any other country that would ever act on assumption that it has the right to unilateralism of any sort will find as far as Pakistan is concerned that it has made a basic mistake, and countries will face disastrous consequences if they carry out such operations,” said Foreign Secretary Salman Bashir with a straight face, only pausing to smirk when he thought no one was looking. “Especially India” he said as everyone burst into fits of manic laughter, eventually bringing part of the roof down onto these government officials who died instantly.

In other news, Indian Prime Minister Dr. Manmohan Singh has just passed away. He was 79. While the cause of death is yet to be determined, people close to the issue say that they found him laughing and breathless in front of a TV just before he died.

Written by sirkapyaaz

May 6, 2011 at 12:02 AM

Posted in Uncategorized

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